Joel Shapiro
From Uwphitau
Contents |
Biography
- Name: Joel "Maable Khaalumns" Shapiro
- Born: He's a baby! That's all ya gotta know. (11/23/1987)
- Hometown: Portland, OR
- Highschool: Tucson High Magnet School for Performing and Visual Arts
- Majors: Informatics, Communication, French
- Minors: European Studies
- Pledge Class: Epsilon (2.0)
Brotherly Awards
- The Overcompensation Award: Recognizing Joel's 46" TV.
- At Least the Huskies Pwnd "Somebody" Award: Recognizing Joel getting knocked down during the 2007 UW homecoming football game by reciever Anthony Russo http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvseSGA7yac
Watchu Talkin Bout, Willis?
Joel's story is one of awakening. Joel has reached what we might call a "crossroads" in his life.
College is a confusing time for everyone. So much to think about! Money, classes, girls, boys, being good at halo, being bad at halo, and of course nutella. Joel's big brother, Joel Murray, surely gave the younger Joel much guidance through his life. But times move ever-forward, and with the Big Joel having hopped across the lake for grad school, the so called J-Shap spends much time these days pondering life under the glow of his 50 inch hi-def television.
So let's get down to brass tacks, ladies and gentlemen. Here, told through a wiki picturebook, is the story of Joel's awakening thus far. Enjoy!
- Joel has built up many relationships with guys in his life, and always has what might be called a "very" friendly way about him in pictures. Doesn't that joy just radiate from his face in this picture?
- Even in his high school days, Joel knew he was "different," often pushing the edge of the acceptable in many ways. In this picture, we see it is through his choice of hat. Never one to back down in the face of criticism, Joel has worn many "offbeat" hats during his tenure at Phi Tau; if you wanna see more, you'd better stop by!
- Now come on, how could you not have a man crush on this hunk of pasty sailorness? Plus, its another hat!
- Joel thinks butts are funny. Stay tuned, you may very well see that butt in The Daily...
- Joel even has a remarkable ability to build relationships with "brothers from another mother"; in this picture, one can see the bond that has formed between two of the most unlikely fellows: a Phi Tau and a Psi U! No Phi Tau until Joel has been able to draw the type of endearing look from a Psi U as can be seen in this picture. As Joel might say, BaDONKadonk!
- Finally, Joel places great pride in his things, especially those that make him the "coolest new kid in the neighborhood," just like Paul Oakenfold in Starry Eyed Surprise. It's important that if you are friends with Joel, you compliment him on his toys! Here we can see his "bike." When you first talk to him, tell him that you think his motorcycle is cool, that you wish you were that cool, and that you want him to give you a ride. He may very well serve you up a cool cup of 99 Bananas!
Other Stuffs
As of May 19th, 2008, when he was contacted by then house Secretary Tim Shigeta about a JBoard violation, Joel became a (time) bandit (according to Phi Tau official records). He is currently being sought after by JBoard members throughout time and space.
See Also
A Note on Satire
For anyone who is still wondering, this page is a piece of satire. We all love our Joel, and regardless of his quirks, he's a pretty cool chap. He just needs to be put in his place every so often. Let us hope that this page will remain a testament to all those who don't take life too seriously.
With that said, here is some further reading:
A Facebook Group I Found That May Or May Not Dedicated To Our Man Of Honor
